Monday, August 23, 2010

Query: How many hoops must I jump through?

I have been very fortunate to be able to work on my doctoral thesis because I love the topic. It has not gotten old and QM has been pretty good to me overall. I have met some interesting and boring people on my journey so far (mostly interesting). I have had so many adventures and not just because the topic is Africa and I travel there. Sometimes Holborn and Mile End can each be a wonderful adventure in their own special way. But my query is this...we all jump through hoops in life but when do we get to say enough is enough?

I love QM hoops. I could go through them all day long. I have served time in a long-term relationship so I understand those hoops. Also, I still do the Mommy hoops (with pleasure). But American Academic Journal hoops--when it really, really, really seems to me that they are just yanking my chain?? I am about to pull the plug.

I have had an article sitting and waiting to get published--so I thought. I was wondering why I had not heard from the Journal since the end of May when I sent my FINAL copy...stating that "....this was my final copy and further edits will just prove to me that this article does not fit with this journal and someone there should admit that and stop torturing me...." Well, I said as much. I did actually.

Alas, I JUST opened the email that said, "Here are the new revisions and after those, there will be a final edit." I know the wise thing would be to consider these revisions and not blog about my blood pressure....but, the blood pressure won out.

WT-frekin-F???? I saw red. And not like cherry red or strawberry red, but, like, actual blood red. I had to control myself when replying. I wanted to say something really bad, but they are just law students....and clearly so much smarter than I (or is it smarter than me).

The problem is, I just don't think my writing sucks quite that much. So there is someone who thinks this article could be "better" or "more." Honestly, upon reading it there are some sections that have been so over-edited they no longer even sound like me. I do not actually think this is an ego issue. I think that I had something to say and it has been so edited out I almost feel like the 'right' thing to do is kill it. That way my name will never be associated with it...because I am not sure what it is anymore. (see, Aliens 3 with Sigourney Weaver--cloning the Alien DNA with did not turn out well...!!!)

I understand hoop-jumping, I am female after all. We were born to jump the hoops. I excel at jumping hoops. But there has to be a purpose--a real reason that makes sense, at least to me. But this feels like hoop-jumping, for hoop-jumpings sake with very little benefit to me.

QUERY: When is it the time to say, "Take your Hoop and shove it???"

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